TalesfromtheBenevolentEgoinPiscesmovingintoAries.

TheObserver

Onceuponatimetherewassomuchlight!Somuchlove!Foritwasoneandthe same.Golden.Abundant.Sopowerful;sobeautiful.Soincrediblydazzling!Itwasall ofexistence;itwasexistence.Itshonelikethebrighteststarimaginable,seemingto growandgrowinintensity. Until.somethinghappeneddifficulttoexplain,describebutitreachedapointof luminousecstasysointenseitdissolvedintoitselfandindoingso,expanded outwardsforbothdirectionswereoneandthesame.Likeagigantic,cosmicsigh,it overflowed. ThisrockedthesensesoftheAbundance.Itcalledouttoitselfandindoingso, anotherkindofenergywasborn.Onethatrippledandmovedinstreams.The Abundancefocusseddeepwithinitselfanddiscoveredanewwayofseeing;akind ofopticalillusion.Thingsstartedtolookfuzzy;akindoffragmentationwas occurring,asthoughthewholenesshadactuallybeenaninfinitenumberoftiny individualpartsheldtogether.Thiswasofcourseridiculous,buttheAbundance enjoyedwitnessingit.Itwasinteresting.Liketheoppositeoflookingatoneofthose MagicEyepictures,whererandomdotssuddenlymakea3Dpicture.Thiswasa picture,awholeness,thatsuddenlylooked(ifyousquintedandtookastepback)like dots!Howfunny! TheAbundancesuddenlyhadanothernewthought,akindofjokereallyandmade thedotscallouttoeachother.Iamhere!Iamhere!AndcalledbackDont besilly,ofcourseyouare,weknow!Andthedots/Abundancegiggled. Anditdidntmatterbecauseitwasjustajokeandthepartswereallreallyoneand thesameandpartofthewhole.Andtheoverflowingandfragmentationcontinued andthepartskeptcallingforawhile,butthentheystopped,fortheyknewthey wereallstillhere,stilltogether.Ofcoursetheywere.Andajokeisonlyfunnyforso long.Butionspassed.(Anotherkindofdimensionthatwecalltime.)Andthey stoppedcalling:IamhereandtheystoppedhearingOfcourseyouare.And theyForgot. AndtheAbundanceallowedthistohappen.Alloweditselftodissolvealittle,asit expanded.Andthedotsstartedtorotateontheirownaxesalthoughtheywerestill heldbythestreamtothewhole.Andsomeevenstartedtopayattentiontowhat appearedtobeinbetweenthem,apparentgapsinthelight,andtheycalledthis darknessasthoughittoowasasomethingthathadaseparateexistence.

 Thensomethingevenstrangerhappened;thestreamchanged,vanished.Itdidnt really,buttheyhadforgottenhowtoseeit.Theystartedtoactuallybelievein separation.Andindoingsotheystartedtoactasiftheyreallywereseparate.The partsstartedtogravitateawayfromoneanotherrandomly.Anewkindofenergy wasborn,onethatwasthepolaroppositeofthestreamthathadheldthemtogether. Thiswasexcitingatfirst,butthentheystartedtofeelstrangeandafterawhileit wasntfunanymore.Therewasanawfullotofthisdarkness!Theybecamedesperate tocomebacktogether,butofcoursetobelievethatthiswasnecessary,only confirmedtheideaofseparation.Andsotheytriedtodoitontheirown,which wasatautologicalcosmicjoke.Infailingtoseethefunnysidetheyfellfurther awayfromoneanother. Nowtherewasaseriousproblem.Theexpansionhadbecomearandomoutflowing. TheintensityoftheAbundance,anintensityofmovementaway,awayfromunity. Andwhenthepoorfragmentedpartsmetbyaccident,theydidntevenrecognise oneanother,andindeed,evenrepelledoneanother.Theystartedcallingout:Iam here,Iamhere(evenwhentheybelievedtherewasnoonelisteningorevenout thereatall). AfewpartscriedoutmournfullytotheircellularmemoryoftheAbundance. Iamalone,Iamseparated,Iamlost Anditrepliedwithathoughtfulsigh: Youarehere Anditshowedthemamap.Oneinmerelythreedimensions.Amapwhichpandered totheirsickness,onewhichusedtheverysymbolismoftheirdeludedhearts.It understoodthatitneededtospeaktheirlanguagetogetthemtolistenatall.Amap inwhicheverythingwasindeedseparateandtheycouldfindthemselvesandeach otherandthewayhome.Itwentbacktobasics!Indeedithadtocreatethemforthe purpose. Alrightnowpayattentionplease.ThisisUpandthisisDownerand thisisthemostimportantbitaligntothisfirstplease!Yes,good! NowyouaretunedintotheAbundanceagain.Nowturnaroundslowlyyes thatsverygood!No,keepyourbackpressedagainstthetreefornow,soyoudont getlostagain!Starttomoveslowlyroundwellstartwithfourdirectionsforthe timebeingandthenwelldomore. Youneedtotraveltoeachofthedirections.Asyoudothisyouwillrememberalittle moreeachtime.Butkeepcomingbacktothecentre,totheTree!

Whatdoyoumean:ItsabitDark?Dark?? AhIsee.Well,itgetser..darkerthefurtherdownyougoandlighterthe higherupyougo.Andinthemiddleitssortofambientlikeyouhadinviteda girlroundandwereonapromise.Youneedtogodownanduptoseeand understandthis.Andyouneedtovisitthedirectionsasyoudothis. Butmostimportantofallyouhaveletgoofeveryseparatedthoughtyouhave everhad. Buthowdowedothat?theycried. TheAbundancesmiledLook! Andtheylookedandtheystartedtosmiletoofortheysawsomethingtheyhadlong forgotten.Itwasthestream.Anditmovedinswirling,spirallingmovementsaround thecentre.Anditpulledthepainandthefearandtheotherunmentionableand mentionableenergiesthattheyhadcreatedintheirlongexiletokeepthemselves company.Andtheseenergiesandcreationsmovedintothecentreandoutfromthe spiralcameabeautifulgoldenlightthatfilledtheiremptiness. Andslowly,eversoslowly,someofthemcametobelievetheywere,themselves,the Abundance.Theyweresogolden,soverybrightandbeautiful. Andtheotherssawthisandweredrawntowardsthespiral.Thestreamflowedthe otherwayagain.Andtheflowofthestreamstartedtopullothersbackinto awarenesstoo.Andtheyrememberedtheyweretheabundanceandthesteam flowedevenmorestrongly.AndtheAbundancegrewbrighterandbrighteruntilit reachedthatsameoriginalpointofecstasyandonceagainitdissolvedintoitselfand startedtooverflowandtheprocessstartedagain(althoughreallyithadnever stopped).Anditoverflowedagainandagain Well,thatsallverywellbutwhatsthebloodypoint?snappedfragmentedpart8x 10tothetrizillionpower.Sheshiftedherimaginarybodyalittle,raisedapert buttockandfarted.Itsallverywelltowitteronaboutunityandonenessandthe greatcosmicflowofexistence,butwhybotheratall?Ifunityissogreatwhyarewe goingthroughthistediousexercise?Whygoonajourneyifwearealreadyatour destination? TheAbundancesmiled.Becauseitisonlythemovementofthestreamthatmatters. Thestreammustflow,mustwaxandwaneandchangepolarity.Likethemovement ofthetides,theverybreathswetake.Allofexistenceisinthisenergyofebband

flow.Nothingthatisstaticandunchangingcantrulyexist.Permanenceisactually constantchange,constantflow.Thecosmicbreath.

Separation

Iamaloneinthedarkness.Ihavebeenhereforallofmymemory.Thereisonlythis. AndIamafraid.YetIhavehadmomentswhenIhaveglimpsedlight.These momentsmoveinandoutofmyawareness.Partofmedoesnotbelieveinthemat all.Theyarethehallucinationsofadiseasedmind.ForIamalsoseparatedwithin myself.IdonotevenknowwheretolocatethisthingIcallI.Acryofthewounded animalinthedarkness.IlookfortheseglimpsesoflightasIrotateonmyaxis, believing,notbelieving. AndthenImakeadecision.Ichoosetobelieve.Andinthechoosing,thelight becomesmoretangible.AndIseeaspotoflighthoveringinthedarknessandmove towardsit.Itissoluminous,sobeautiful.AndIdrawcloserandcloser.ButasIdraw evercloserthelightdisappears.AndIamindarknessagain.Irepeatthisprocess overandoveragain.AndthenIstop.AndIlisten.AndinthedarknessIhear something.Itismyownbreath.Yetitismore.AndsuddenlyIseethelightagain, butitiswithinme.AndImovetowardsitinanactofnomovement.Ofcomplete surrenderandacceptanceandforgiveness.

Unity

IamtheAbundance.Iamthelight.Iameverythingandnothing.InessenceIam merelytheflow.Thereisnoeffort,nomovement,nogoal,nothingtoachieve.I simplyamflow.AndIbreatheoutandallowmylighttoexpanduntilitsfullness. Thenagap.Agapofpeakluminosityanddarkness.Offullnessandemptiness whereatransmutationoccurs.Andthenitpassesandwithoutanywill,the expansionreversesandallcomesbacktowardsthecentre.Andsoitcontinues.