The 10 Commandments of Family Life

(Taken from FAMILY LIFE MDS by Linda Poitras)

1. Love the Lord thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might (Deuteronomy 6:4-5). Every part of living for God depends on the love I have for Him. That love will express itself in obedience to His laws and plans, plainly given in His written Word, including directives about marriage. If ye love me, keep my commandments (1John 2:3-6) (Include Esaus story here Genesis 27:38.) 2. Honor thy father and mother (Exodus 20:12; Ephesians 6:1-3). No matter what age, we all must honor our parents. This does not include blanket obedience, because we must still follow Gods commandments. 3. Know how to possess his vessel in sanctification and honour; (1Thessalonians 4:3-7). This passage requires all believers to follow Gods high standards of purity and sanctification in regard to all sexual matters. The word defraud (v. 6) means to go beyond what is right, to transgress, to overreach. All sexual play or activity outside of marriage is an act of terrible injustice against another individual. Sexual looseness before marriage defiles and robs another person of the holiness and chastity that God desires for him or her, destroying the purity and virginity that must be brought into a marriage (Colossians 3:5). 4. Flee fornication (1Corinthians 6:15-20). In sexual immorality a person virtually removes himself from union with Christ by making his body a member of the immoral and ungodly person. The use of present tense in this passage tells us the Christian must repeatedly flee sexual immorality (Genesis 39:12). 5. Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers. . . (2Corinthians 6:14-18). The ultimate division before God is between those who are in Christ and those who are not. So, believers must be very careful about close association or partnership with those who are not in Christ, including business partnerships, dating, marriage, or close friendships. Believers are those who are obedient to the Gospel (Acts 2:38-39; 1Corinthians 15:1-4). This commandment began with Gods Old Testament directives to His chosen people: (Deuteronomy 7:2-4; 17:17-19; Exodus 34:12-14; Joshua 23:12-14; 1Kings 11:2; Ezra 9:2; Psalm 106:35). Gods prophetic warning came true . . . their intermarriage lead to idolatry, immorality, and then captivity and exile. 6. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife (Mark 10:7; Matthew 19:5-6; Genesis 2:24). The marriage relationship is between a man and a woman. Their relationship should grow because of their intimate closeness. This involves a break in the loyalty (not honor and respect) given to parents. 7. Thou shalt not commit adultery (Mark 10:19; Exodus 20:14). Adultery (all types of sexual immorality) is always condemned. The person who commits this sin against God will carry reproach for the rest of his (or her) life (Proverbs 6:32-33). (Tell Davids story here, with consequences 2Samuel 12:7-14). 8. Husbands, love your wives, (Ephesians 5:25; Colossians 3:19). How are husbands supposed to love? Ephesians 5:28-33 explains this mystery in detail. 9. Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord (Ephesians 5:22-23; Colossians 3:18). Wives are to submit to their own husbands, not to every man. Women who understand this principle know that submission to a husband who truly loves her is the best protection she can ever find. He will cherish and encourage her to live her life according to Gods fullest plan. 10. We should HATE divorce as much as God does (Matthew 19:6; Malachi 2:11-16; Matthew 19:8-12; Mark 10:1-12). Both the Old and New Testaments declare this fact. 1Corinthians 7:39 and Romans 7:1-3 speak clearly about the length of marriage vows until death alone shall part you.
(Most notes taken from The Full Life Study Bible KJV, Zondervan Publishing House, Grand Rapids, Michigan, Donald C. Stamps General Editor, 1992.)

Forgiveness is a major part of any relationship especially in the family (Matthew 6:14-15; Mark 11:25). Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger; and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christs sake hath forgiven you (Ephesians 4:31-32).

And Esau said unto his father, Hast thou but one blessing, my father? Bless me, even me also, O my father. And Esau lifted up his voice, and wept (Genesis 27:38). According to Hebrews 12:16-17, Esau lost his blessing because he was a godless person who had disdained the sacredness of the blessing (Genesis 25:31-34). Now he changed his mind and sought the blessing with tears, yet his tears were tears of disappointment and anger, not of sorrow for his own sinful choice. Esaus experience warns us about wrong choices in life that bring terrible consequences that cannot be undone (2Samuel 12:7-14).

Deuteronomy 6:4-5 Exodus 20:12 1Thessalonians 4:3-7 1Corinthians 6:15-20 2Corinthians 6:14-18 Matthew 19:5-6 Mark 10:19 Ephesians 5:25 Ephesians 4:22-23

1John 2:3-6 Ephesians 67:1-3 Colossians 3:5 Genesis 39:12 Mark 10:7 Genesis 2:24 Exodus 20:14 Colossians 3:19 Colossians 3:18

Malachi 2:11-16 Matthew 19:6 Matthew 6:14-15

Matthew 19:8-12 Mark 10:1-12 Mark 11:25

And when the mourning was past, David sent and fetched her to his house, and she became his wife, and bare him a son. But the thing that David had done displeased the LORD (2Samuel 11:27). 11:27 The thing . . . displeased the Lord. Davids sins of adultery, cold-blooded murder, and subsequent cover-up were an exceptional evil in Gods sight. He became guilty of breaking the sixth, seventh, eighth, ninth, and tenth commandments (Exodus 20:13-17). His sins were made greater because he was a shepherd over Gods people (2Samuel 5:2) and the one who was responsible to administer justice and righteousness in Israel (2Samuel 8:15). 12:9 Hast thou despised the commandment of the Lord? The prophet Nathan declared that David, in committing adultery, murder, and deceit, was guilty of despising the commandment of the Lord and despising God Himself (v. 10). Despise (Heb. bazah) means to treat contemptuously, to scorn, to make of little account. Thus by his actions, David was declaring God to be of little account, unworthy of love and devotion. (1) Likewise in the church today, ministers of God who commit adultery reflect their estimate of God and His holy Word. They treat the gospel and the blood of Christ contemptuously, as if they are petty and unworthy of fidelity. (2) The Scriptures state that any professed believer who enters into an adulterous relationship disqualify himself from the office of an overseer (1Timothy 3:2). 12:10 The sword shall never depart from thine house. Because David had despised God and killed Uriah in order to take Uriahs wife for himself, God pronounced judgment on David and his family that would be fulfilled in violence, strife, and murder (i.e., the sword) for the rest of his life (approximately twenty-five years). The Scriptures record at least four events as a result of this curse: the death of the child (v. 14), the murder of Amnon by Absalom (13;29), the killing of Absalom when he turned against his father (18:9-17), and the execution of Adonijah (1Kings 2:24-25). 12:11-12 Thus saith the Lord . . . I will. David dreadful punishment as prophesied by Nathan was not merely the natural consequences of his sin, nor was God passively permitting things to happen to David/ rather, it was the result of Gods direct actions. Three times God used the term I will: I will raise up evil against thee; I will take thy wives before thine eyes; I will do this thing before all Israel. He would experience atrocities at the hands of his own children, such as the raping of Davids daughter Tamar by Amnon (13:7-14) and the violation of Davids wives by Absalom (16:22). 12:12 Before all Israel. The prescribed punishment in Israel for adultery and murder was death (Leviticus 20:10; 24:17). However, God remitted the punishment in this instance, not

so much because of Davids repentance, but because He had to vindicate Himself and His righteousness publicly before all Israel and the nations. For the rest of Davids life he was an example of the righteous judgment of God upon a spiritual leader who had sinned greatly. 12:13 The Lord also hath put away thy sin. Davids sin was forgiven by God in that the death penalty and eternal punishment were remitted (1John 3:15). Thus, David was restored to salvation and fellowship with God (Psalm 51). In spite of this, his reputation was forever blemished and the effects of his sin continued throughout the remainder of his life and family history. Davids experience after he was forgiven and restored is a sober lesson for those who treat sin casually as something that God simply forgives and forgets.
(Notes taken from The Full Life Study Bible KJV, Zondervan Publishing House, Grand Rapids, Michigan, Donald C. Stamps General Editor, 1992).