Choices in

Relationships

Chapter Twelve: Balancing Work

and Family Life
Meanings of Money

 Security—Avoiding Poverty
 Money represents security most
people want.
 Oscar Wilde once said, “When I
was young, I used to think that
money was the most important
thing in life; now that I am older, I
know it is.”
2006 HHS Poverty
Guidelines
48
Persons in Contiguous
Family or States and
Household D.C. Alaska Hawaii
1 $ 9,800 $12,250 $11,270
2 13,200 16,500 15,180
3 16,600 20,750 19,090
4 20,000 25,000 23,000
5 23,400 29,250 26,910
6 26,800 33,500 30,820
7 30,200 37,750 34,730
8 33,600 42,000 38,640
For each
additional  3,400  4,250  3,910
person, add
 Meanings of Money
 Self-Esteem
 Money affects self-esteem because in
our society human worth, particularly
for men, is often equated with financial
achievement.
 Power in Relationships
 Generally, the more money a partner
makes, the more power that person has
in the relationship.
Meanings of Money
 Love
 To some individuals, money also
means love.
 The assumption is that big diamond
equals high price equals deep love.
 Conflict
 Couples argue about what to spend
money on (new car? vacation? pay off
credit card?) and how much money to
spend.
Dual-Earner Marriages

 Effects of the Wife’s

Employment on the Wife
 Enhanced psychological well-
being
 Higher self-esteem

 Greater feelings of independence

 Increased social interaction

Dual-Earner Marriages

 Effects of the Wife’s

Employment on Her Husband

 Husbands also report benefits from

their wives’ employment.
 These include being relieved of the
sole responsibility for the financial
support of the family and having
more freedom to quit jobs, change
jobs, or go to school.
Dual-Earner Marriages

 Effects on the Couple’s Marriage of

Having Two Earners
 Employment won’t affect a happy marriage
but it can do an unhappy one in.
 Effects of the Wife’s Employment on
the Children
 Children do not appear to suffer
cognitively or emotionally as long as
positive consistent child-care alternatives
are in place.
Dual-Earner Marriages

 Day-Care Considerations

 Priorities in day-care selection

include health and safety issues,
caregiver quality, and the child’s
social and educational
development.
Financial Quiz

 70 % of Americans live
paycheck to paycheck…

 What does that mean for your

future?
 Money Makeover Steps
 Save $1000 Fast
 The Debt Snowball
 The Emergency Fund
 Maximize Retirement
 College Funding
 Pay off Mortgage
 Build wealth like crazy
 If you want to live like no one else…
You have start living like no one else
Balancing Demands of
Work and Family
 Superperson Strategy
 The superperson strategy involves
working as hard and as efficiently as
possible to meet the demands of work
and family.
 Cognitive Restructuring
 Another strategy used by some women
and men experiencing role overload and
role conflict is cognitive restructuring,
which involves viewing a situation in
positive terms.
Balancing Demands of
Work and Family
 Delegation of Responsibility/Limiting
Commitments
 A third way couples manage the demands of
work and family is to delegate responsibility
to others for performing certain tasks.
 Planning and Time Management
 The use of planning and time management
is another strategy for minimizing the
conflicting demands of work and family.
Steven R Covey’s 4
Quadrants
Urgent Not Urgent
Important

Not
Important
Balancing Demands of
Work and Family
 Role Compartmentalization

 Some spouses use role

compartmentalization, separating
the roles of work and home so that
they do not think about or dwell on
the problems of one when they
are at the physical place of the
other.
Balancing Work and Leisure
Time with Family
 Importance of Leisure
 Leisure is becoming more important to people.
 The positive value of leisure to a couple’s
marriage interaction and satisfaction is clear.
 Functions of Leisure
 Leisure activities may relieve work-related
stress and pressure; facilitate social interaction
and family togetherness; foster self-expression,
personal growth, and skill development; and
enhance overall social, physical, and emotional
wellbeing.
Barriers to Leisure

 Demands of the Workplace

 A major barrier to leisure has been
the rising demands of the
workplace.
 Materialistic Values
 Many couples get caught up in a vicious
cycle of working long hours to achieve a
certain standard of living, only to find
that this standard of living no longer
satisfies them.
Barriers to Leisure
Barriers to Leisure

 Traditional Gender Roles

 Women also tend to spend their leisure
time engaged in hobbies related to
household tasks, such as cooking,
preserving fruits and vegetables, and
sewing.

 Leisure as a Commodity
 Many leisure activities cost money that
families simply do not have in their
budget.
Barriers to Leisure

 Leisure as Work
 Leisure has become work
because we are “using it as a
means to other ends—stress
reduction, therapy, fitness, and
selfactualization.”

 Some people are reluctant to take

time off for a vacation.