Interpersonal

communication
Topics for today:

• Interpersonal
communication
• Assertiveness
• Verbal, paraverbal and
nonverbal communication
 The Multiple Intelligences
(Howard Gardner, 1993)

• Visual-spatial intelligence (images, icons, maps)

• Verbal-linguistic intelligence (texts, discours)
• Logical-mathematical intelligence (IQ)
• Kinesthetic intelligence (hands)
• Musical intelligence
• Intrapersonal intelligence (introspection, self-
knowledge, self-esteem)
• Interpersonal intelligence (communication)
 Intrapersonal intelligence

Interpersonal intelligence
The key concept
is
Assertiveness
What does it mean to
be assertive
in communication?
It is the best conscious choice between two extremes:

passive---------asertive---------aggressive

Outlines:

the right to defend my own interests

obligation not to harm others
 PASSIVE ASSERTIVE AGGRESSIVE

(submissive)  expression that

?
not express their violates the rights of
feelings, views and needs others, sarcasm,
on their own criticize, judge
fail to vouch or assert for  try to dominate others
themselves   use humiliation to
allow others to interfere control others 
on their rights and opinions  be very impulsive 
tend to speak in a soft  speak in a loud,
and apologetic manner demanding, and
very poor eye contact overbearing voice 
and improper body  not listen well
language and postures  have piercing eye
contact and an
overbearing posture
To be assertive means:
Verbal (content):
 express feelings clearly, appropriately, and
respectfully 
 use “I” statements 
 communicate respect for others
 consider adverse views
 formulate positive statements
 active listening
Paraverbal (voice):
 use a tone of voice calm and warm
 using a suitable rhythm of speech, nor too slowly
nor too rushed
 use the appropriate volume
 speaks with the voice of chest not from the neck
 active listening
Nonverbal (mimics, gesture, posture)
 to have a relaxed body posture & body
alignment 
 to have good eye contact (look to the upper
triangle face)
 to smile with selfconfidence
 active listening
Active listening
What is expedient assertiveness for you?

to feel competent and in selfcontrol

to develop your social& professional skills
to not allow others to abuse or manipulate you
to feel connected to others
to help others development
to formulate effective demand
refuse what's not in your interest
to manage/moderate conflicts
to make known your wishes, needs, feelings;
What is asertiveness:

It is a technique that can help alleviate conflicts

It is a proof of maturity&responsibility in interpersonal
communication
It is a way to create a respectful environment for others to grow

We cannot be assertive all the time.

vs
Assertive attitude is based on
some values:
e ct si
re sp nc er
it y
coop
open erati
ing on
empathy
hon v i ty
esty s i t i
p o
More about nonverbal
communication
 Every act of communication involves sending a message
 This message can have one to three dimensions: verbal, paraverbal and nonverbal
 How are the three dimensions mostly perceived in communication?
Albert Mehrabian formula: 7 – 38 – 55
 Nonverbal communication
Mimics (expressions&microexpressions)
Gesture (manual, nonmanual)
Posture (the body orientation)
Olfactory communication
Clothes
Proxemics
 Mimics
eyes (gazes, eyeball, seyebrow)
mouth ( smile, lips, mandibula)
microexpression (involuntary)
head position
 Gesture

Informative gestures Communicative gestures

 are passive gestures that  are gestures that are
provide information about produced intentionally and
the speaker as a being and meaningfully by a person
not about what the speaker who try to complete the
is trying to communicate verbal communication
 we can observe them at  they complement what we
the others and we can verbally say
control them to us
 Proxemics
(the study of space and how we use it)

Edward T Hall (1966)

Intimate distance (close&very close interactions)
Personal distance (friendly interactions)
Public distance (strangers)
Social distance (large group of peopl)

Mirroring effect
CONGRUENCE

Why authentication is required at first place? Generally, our brain maintains

coordination among facial expression, posture, movement, and tone of voice. If they
remain more synchronized with each other, a message gets across more effectively
and correctly.  

CLUSTERING

Combination of different sensory stimulus/inputs, facial expressions, eye contacts,

gestures, movements, postures and para linguistic clues convey a distinct message.
Most of us try to interpret each of them in isolation, often leading us to complete
misunderstanding. Like composing sentences, we need to put them together.
 http://www.nonverbal-world.com
http://www.trainingzone.co.uk/develop/cpd/
trainers-tips-active-listening-exercises