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INTERPERSONAL CONFLICT

Valenzano III, J. M., Broeckelman-Post, M. A., & Sahlstein Parcell, E. M. (2016).

Communication Pathways.  Southlake, TX: Fountainhead.
Conflict
• Natural part of relationships
• Can foster growth if managed well
• Communication is both:
– Source of conflict
– Remedy for conflict
• Makes management a challenge
• Need skill development to deal with
conflict well
Defining Conflict
• Expressed Struggle
• Between Two Interdependent Parties
• With Perceived
– incompatible goals
– scarce resources
– Interference from each other
How we talk about conflict
• Metaphors for Conflict
• Positive
– Game, dance, exercise
• Negative
– War, fight, explosion
Reasons for Conflict
• Parties have different information
• Parties have different interpretations
• Parties conclusions reflect self-interest
Conflict Management
• Problematic Behaviors
– Four horsemen of the apocalypse
• Criticism
• Contempt
• Defensiveness
• Stonewalling
Conflict Management Styles
• Two dimensions
– Assertiveness and cooperativeness
• Five Styles
– Competing
– Accommodating
– Avoiding
– Compromising
– Collaboration
Dialogue and Conflict Resolution
• Use description vs. evaluation
• Focus on solving problem, not
controlling outcomes
• Be spontaneous, not strategic
• Express empathy, not neutrality
• Acknowledge equality, don’t be
superior
• Be provisional, not certain